Confessions of a fuck up.

I seriously don't know what is wrong with my body. I've haven't slept since yesterday at 3, you think I would be tired but no I have energy. I'm pretty wide awake 21 hours later. Again couldn't sleep last night, and it wasn't because of aches or pains. Just couldn't, so again I went for a run and did a few crunches and legs. When I was running I had a really bad sharp pain in my side, I thought I was going to pass out from the lack of food I've had this week. I've been so good, so focused, so determined. I wasn't planning on eating at all today. Since I couldn't fast yesterday I decided today I would. I just royally FUCKED that up. I binged and purged I'm very disappointed in myself. I'M PISSED OFF AT MYSELF. To the point where I want to run till I actually pass the fuck out. The rest of the day I will not sit down. I'm going to scrub my house from ceiling to floor and once my step dad gets home and can watch my brother and sister I'm going for the longest run. Like I said till I pass out.

I've been experiencing some terrible pains lately. I'm pretty sure I got everything out after purging I weighed .2 pounds less actually after I purged. I'm guessing the .2 was from water weight. I've never experienced the pain I was feeling in my ribs as I was purging. I've had the occasional stomach aches and cramps but these pains were so much worse. I could barely breathe. And I don't know why. I've been so much better to my body this week. This is the first time this week that I've purged. Not quite sure. Anyways enough wasting time on this damn computer, gonna clean, do a shit load of crunches, do the cardio workout on p90x and run for miles and miles. I hope everyone is having a better day than what I just made mine out to be.